Monday, June 1, 2015

What I learned my first year of home school preschool.

So we wrapped up Home school Preschool with Miss Belle
When I started this year I wrote this post 
I was feeling extreme anxiety
Being a stay at home mom since the day she was born has been one of the greatest blessings.
I never wanted to be a stay at home mom. 
in fact I had a aunt who stayed at home with her kids and she seemed so stressed all of the time and her little ones made her want to pull her hair out. I assumed all stay at home moms were crazy slaves. I didn't want that. I didn't want to put my career on hold. I didn't want to depend on my husband for basically all the income. 
Then as my maternity leave was coming to an end and I was trying to figure out how I was going to leave this perfect little girl. I looked at my husband and he already knew what I was thinking. 
"We will figure things out. she needs you."
so I held her tight basking in the fact that I was going to get to watch her grow everyday. I would be there for every meal, smile, boo boo, cuddle, sick day, fun day and nothing special but just as important day in between. 
I became a crazy slave to my Miss Belle.
 5 years seems like a good chunk of time. in the beginning it feels like it's so far away. But as that saying goes; The days are long but the years are fast.
It's so true. 
5 years has flown!

So I wanted to slow down this last year I had with her at home. 
obviously I couldn't do that but I could carve out time everyday for some one on one. So I worked hard and organized for hours. did as much research as I could. got tons of books and workbooks. I planned out themes, activities and field trips.
 I had expectations but I also had a lot of doubt. I, myself struggled in school. I didn't have a teaching degree and I misspell words on the regular. I knew the best time for preschool would be during nap time and I selfishly wasn't sure if I wanted to give up that quite hour to myself. 
But I found out fast how much fun we were having together. she really was learning and loving it! I was filled with so much pride in her when she conquered her name in that first week! something I seriously thought would take a lot longer.
 It was like a high.
 I taught my daughter this.
 I worked with her and I witnessed the light bulb turn on and it clicked in her little mind. I learned so much about her. things I never otherwise would have learned. I am not a perfect parent. I make mistakes everyday. But there are somethings I know 100% without a doubt I did the right thing. Mommy's intuition I guess you can call it.
 Home school preschool was the best decision for our family, for Miss Belle and for me. 
I did a little review with her about everything we learned these past 8 months.
I asked her questions
What was your favorite subject we learned about?
Babies and Daddy week
what was your favorite way we learned?
Reading books
 What was your favorite field trip we went on?
What do you wish we would have learned about?

She was tested to start Kindergarten and didn't do too well.
she is extremely shy and didn't answer any of the teachers questions. 
The school denied her acceptance to be enrolled.
insert Mommy's intuition again.
after many prayers and conversations with my husband and even a Huge nudge from my late Grandma before she passed We have decided to enroll her at another school.
 she will start this coming August. it's time. she is ready. I need to let her go and take that first step out of our little nest and let her spread those wings. but first we will have one amazing last summer before her school career starts.
Home school preschool will reopen when Stella turns 4. 
that's in a few years though.
a few years I am sure will come faster than I will be ready for. so the anxiety will continue.

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